Devious Concoctions.

I wanted to work things out, i never did want to run. But you frightened me, i didn’t know what else to do. At that moment, it seemed like the best thing to do.

I’m my own individual, i make my own rules and i follow them. Don’t tell me to change my principles, because that has kept me alive all this while.

Don’t scream at me, it only makes things worst.

I feel like a fool for trusting you, for trusting that you’ll never hurt me, for giving you me. I never want to feel like I’m in hell again, but i have. I just never thought you would do it to me like the others.

I may be naive, inexperience, ignorant and dumb. But at least i know I’m making some changes in my life for you, but you didn’t see those. You wanted something more. That’s not me.

I want to know the real you. Why won’t you let me?

I tried explaining everything, offering my apologies again and again but you didn’t budge. Seems to me something else is much more important.

Why are you taking out your anger on me? I’ve already justified my reasons, I’ve explained everything. But you’re like someone i know who wouldn’t hear me out even though I’m crying in front of you. You always hated me for crying. But I’m going to be strong from now on.

Don’t say i never listened to you. I did. But there is someone else i have to listen to- my heart. Did you ever listen to me? Ask yourself that.

I’m scared of you, did you know that? I’m scared of talking to you, in case i arouse your suspicions and anger. You’re like my father whom i fear. I’m scared because i don’t know who you are anymore.

I’m tired of all of this. I really want to make a new start with you. Now i don’t know where to go. But i don’t want to leave yet. Because of that, i know I’m a fool.

I don’t care if you’re angry or enraged because of this. This is me. Take it or leave it.

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